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The Art of Vegan Giving

11/29/2018

Gifts should be given freely from the heart, with no reservations.

Q:
Where should vegans draw the line on issues such as gift giving? For instance, what should I do if a family member requests a nonvegan present, such as leather gloves, and adamantly rejects a vegan alternative, such as fiber fleece gloves? Is it unethical to buy such a present if it is truly what the person wants?

Compassion for All?

10/18/2018

Is it possible to feel compassion for people whose ethics and behavior clash with the core values of veganism?

Q:
I am keenly aware of your views on compassion for all living things -- even humans who think it is acceptable to eat meat, or humans who think they were put on this earth to dominate animals and eat their flesh, or humans who use animals for entertainment, or humans who think that war is necessary or that hunting is valuable. I find myself unable to reach such levels of empathy. I am not even charitable enough to excuse them simply because they do not know how animals suffer for trivial human purposes. How do you find it in your heart to be open to such people? Why do you allow them such latitude?

Taming Teen Rebellion

9/20/2018

What can a nonvegan family do when a vegan teen has a chip on their shoulder?

Q:
My teenage stepdaughter is a strict vegan. When she was with us over the summer, we were running two kitchens in one. The fridge was always stuffed to the gills. She insisted on total control of her diet, devoting her days to planning, shopping, cooking, and eating. When I offered dishes that were completely free of animal products, she refused, as if I were trying to poison her. She viewed us with disdain, having more compassion for a common housefly than for her family.

The Importance of Laughter: Rediscovering Humor in a Cynical World

8/9/2018

If we immerse ourselves solely in sadness and suffering, that is all that we will notice.

Q:
I used to pride myself on my wonderful sense of humor, but having awakened to the endless suffering of animals, it has become increasingly difficult for me to find amusement in the world. Instead, I find myself growing cynical and angry.

Is Bread Vegan?

6/21/2018

Is it difficult to find vegan bread?

Q:
What kinds of vegan breads are available and where can I find them?

Are Vegans Too Picky?

6/7/2018

Is it OK to occasionally "cheat" on a vegan diet?

Q:
I’ve been vegan (well, “strict vegetarian”) for several months and really feel good about my decision. However, whenever I refuse a cookie or a piece of cake because it has eggs or dairy products in it, my friends and family tell me to “stop being so uptight and strict" about what I eat. Am I being too unreasonable? Do vegans occasionally “indulge" and eat desserts with dairy products in them?

Avoiding Alienation

5/17/2018

Shun or shame: What's the best approach to bring meat eaters into the vegan fold?

Q:
A dilemma that keeps turning up in my life is the issue of sharing meals with nonvegans while they eat animal flesh.

Is Veganism Only for the Affluent?

5/3/2018

Is a vegan lifestyle elitist and only for the privileged?

Q:
I understand the appeal of a vegan lifestyle, and its importance from an emotional, health, and environmental perspective, but I worry that the commitment is one of privilege. It can be very time-consuming and expensive to live a dedicated vegan lifestyle. People from a lower economic status may not have the resources (a computer, for example), time, or money to research veganism or buy product alternatives.

Is Coffee Vegan?

4/19/2018

Is it OK for vegans to drink coffee?

Q:
Is there anything in coffee or that's part of the growing and processing of coffee beans that isn't vegan?

Tension at the Table

4/5/2018

Anger, no matter how righteous, can be as destructive and counterproductive as any other type of anger.

Q:
We are desperate for help to keep our family together and loving each other. My grandson has been a vegan since he was about thirteen. He is now twenty-five and currently lives with us. His continual anger toward us because we eat meat has created a great deal of unhappiness and division within our family.

Too Much Nooch?

3/22/2018

Is it possible to get too much of a good thing?

Q:
I love nutritional yeast and sprinkle it liberally on almost all of the dishes I prepare at home (beans, soups, sauces, steamed veggies, salads, popcorn, and more). Is it possible to overdo nooch, or is it pretty much harmless?

Should I Treat If They Eat Meat?

3/8/2018

A true gift takes into account the preferences of the recipient.

Q:
What should I do when I take meat-eating friends out to lunch and I offer to treat? I'm really disturbed by the thought of paying for a meat meal, but I feel equally uncomfortable saying, “Sorry, but I won't spend my money on increasing the suffering of animals.”

Will Veganism Make a Difference?

2/22/2018

Should the effect our ethical choices have on other people matter?

Q:
An acquaintance of mine recently found out that my boyfriend and I are vegan and was curious to know why. He said he hoped it wasn’t to “save the cows” because it won’t work -- one person not eating animal products isn't going to change anything. I explained that I wasn’t the only one and that there are quite a few vegans around the world. He still insisted that nothing will change because people's food habits are culturally ingrained.

Making Vegan Gelatin

2/1/2018

Q:
I would like to make vegan Jell-O. I know that I need to use agar, but what about the flavoring?

Rooming with a Vegan

1/18/2018

Can vegans and nonvegans get along living under the same roof?

Q:
I am a nonvegan who is searching for a roommate. I came across an ad placed by a woman who also is looking for a roommate. I called her, and she sounds great, but she did mention that she's vegan. I was wondering what I could expect sharing space with a vegan. She told me she has lived with nonvegans before, but one remark has me concerned. She said she may not be able to concentrate on her studies if I were cooking meat. However, she did express interest in living with me. If a vegan says she is willing to live with a nonvegan, should I expect that she will be tolerant of my nonvegan lifestyle?

Should We Prioritize Our Compassion?

12/7/2017

Should concerns about animals take a back seat to concerns about other people?

Q:
I had been vegetarian for many years and then became vegan, but I struggled with an ethical dilemma. After spending several months working overseas in Guatemala, I questioned whether veganism is for me. Aside from the dietary struggles facing a vegan in the poorer countries of the world, I faced some value conflicts. After seeing the extreme poverty and suffering of many Guatemalans, the plight of animals just seemed less important.

Holiday Heartache

11/16/2017

Many people have idealistic expectations for holidays, but reality doesn't always bend to our wishes.

Q:
My best friend, who isn't vegan, invited my family to a traditional Thanksgiving celebration. Initially I turned her down because I didn't want to be surrounded by a dead bird and other animal products. But she came back a few days later and offered to make a vegan feast instead. When her other friends were told of the change in menu, they reacted with extreme hostility, and now the whole thing is off. I want to help my bestie deal with her other friends' reactions, but I feel lost. Any suggestions?

How Much Is Enough?

10/26/2017

How can we distinguish between extravagance and necessity, desire and need?

Q:
In your writings you've mentioned that it's important for everyone to "learn how to maintain a comfortable and responsible balance between austerity and excess." This is something I grapple with every day. Do you have any suggested questions that I could ask myself when I'm in the midst of decision-making that would help me determine if my choices fit somewhere between the two?

Sharing the Table with Meat Eaters

10/5/2017

What should vegans do when friends, family, or colleagues eat meat in their presence?

Q:
A dilemma that keeps turning up in my life is the issue of sharing meals with nonvegans while they're eating meat. My wife is very much against it and has decided to arrive at gatherings after the food has been consumed. Some family members are okay with this, but others are not. My mother feels that we should be with the entire family to “break bread,” as she says. I say that “breaking bread” would be fine, just not “breaking animals.”

Instilling Vegan Values

9/21/2017

When it comes to food choices, where does a parent's rule end and a child's independence begin?

Q:
Most vegans seem to be concerned about how meat-eating parents react to nonconforming vegan teens. But what if the tables were turned? What if a child was raised vegan but later began eating meat against the family’s wishes? In that event, what should parents do?

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